When I saw that Chance Rhodenizer, the bassist and backing vocalist of one of my favorite bands, Etched In Embers, was starting a new solo music project, I was intrigued right away. I knew it would be good, because Chance and I pretty much have similar taste in music. I’m a big metalcore fan, and exploring Chance’s personal Spotify playlist I’ve seen he tends to enjoy heavier music, too. I was so excited for him to release his first song, “The Devil Came For Me”, August 17th. I was not disappointed! I asked Chance if I could write about his project and the new song for my blog. He agreed, and I sent him some questions to answer about it. What he sent back to me was truly amazing. It’s a story that needs to be told and can possibly help a lot of people because it’s so relatable and so important. More to come later about the deeper meaning behind Chance’s music.
First, I want to share how Chance got involved in music. He gave me the backstory. His entrance into the music world was different than most people. For as long as he can remember, Chance has played guitar. He also watched his dad, Russ Rhodenizer, the front man of Etched In Embers, sit around on the couch jamming on his acoustic while writing songs, attended his band practices, and even worked the door at some of his shows. Chance credits his dad’s influence as one of the reasons why he has such great taste in music.
Russ actually bought Chance his first drum set in his early teenage years, and Chance believes that, if he hadn’t joined the military, that would have been his primary instrument. Instead, he joined the Marines and served our country for four years. (From myself and all the other grateful Americans who read this piece – THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE, CHANCE!)
While he was stationed in California, Russ shipped Chance his acoustic guitar, so he jammed on that a lot. He also had a super cheap electric drum kit, but he didn’t really touch that. It was all just a fun hobby at the time, but a couple years after Chance got out of the military in 2018 he finally went to a couple of Russ’s Etched In Embers gigs as a fan. This really “ignited” him (pun intended) to buy a guitar and start writing his own material, which was under a little Soundcloud project called Constant Resolve.
Chance started learning how to scream and do some basic songwriting. He believes he progressed as a musician a lot in a few short months, though he admits that what he recorded sucked. The growth was important, however, because he was able to show his dad what he was doing musically, which he believes ultimately is what led him to being in Etched In Embers. A good friend of his and EIE guitarist Tyler Kenyon’s, Doug, had mentioned to Tyler that since the band was without a bass player and looking they should ask Chance. Chance thinks Doug must have been following the videos he would post. So Chance tried out for EIE, learning the songs by ear for the most part, and the rest, as they say, is history! His first real show after joining the band in June of 2021 other than a local one they did was The Sound 228 Dirty Thirty Fest in 2021. They followed that up by opening for Drowning Pool.
Etched In Embers has been Chance’s only band up until now, and has been his only experience playing live music, so some people would say he was thrown into something pretty serious for his first gig. He’s had to learn a lot in a short amount of time, not just about growing as a musician but about all the things that come with being in a band and being a serious professional both on and off stage. He admits he’s still a little green at it, but he does believe he’s come a long way. Chance says he’s always looking for ways to grow, and he knows he still has a lot of room to do so. He’s hard on himself, and being somewhat new to it all adds to the pressure he puts on himself, but he thinks it’s for the best because he’s always striving to get better. He says he’s always thrived when he’s been thrown into the fire in any job, and Etched In Embers has been no exception. Chance is really proud of how far Etched In Embers has come as a band since he joined it. He says they’ve taken it much further than he ever thought they would, and he is loving it.
Though Etched In Embers is his primary focus, Chance decided that this was a good time to branch out a little and start his own music project, which he has called In Sight Of Mind. There is a story to this name. Chance says he had been pondering names for a while, ever since he decided to pursue a solo project. He knew he wanted it to represent what his songs would be about, which was a deeper look into what’s going on inside his own head. In Sight Of Mind is fitting, because Chance’s songs give listeners real insight into the darker parts of his mind and his mental struggles.
Chance was originally a guitar player, but started playing bass when he joined Etched In Embers. He also loves to play drums, and has always felt that if he had enough time and space in his home for a drum set he would be a good drummer.
How did “The Devil Came For Me” become the first song released by In Sight Of Mind? Well, Chance had the lyrics already written for the most part. He had a lot going on at the time and sitting down to write the instrumental parts was tough. But getting his lyrics and his story out there was more important to him than anything, so he turned to his friend Myles Clayborne of Vigilante Productions for help. Myles is not only a producer, but he writes killer instrumental tracks, and Chance knew he could trust him with this. Chance sent him some raw vocals and screams and a melody and gave him an idea of what sound influences he wanted to incorporate, and Myles knocked it out of the park.
“The Devil Came For Me” started with a really long concept Chance wrote on his iPhone Notes, which is where he writes all of his lyrics. It actually started out as a rap called “I Met The Devil”, which was inspired by Chance listening to the DAMN. album by Kendrick Lamar. It was basically centered around Chance telling a story about a fictional conversation he had with the Devil across the table. He was telling Chance about all the things he would be dealing with the rest of his life and about the darker side of himself, and trying to convince him of things that didn’t represent him at all. Chance was really digging what he had written, but he realized he had to turn his rap lyrics into a metal track. After sending Myles the raw vocals and getting the instrumentals back from him, Chance finished writing the lyrics. He actually ended up changing the chorus idea he had, and also wrote the second verse. Finally, he went to Myles’ studio to track vocals.
Chance shared even more about the background of this song with me, and gave me the green light to include it in this review. He hopes that his story will help other people who deal with mental health issues. He admits that “The Devil Came For Me” is about his dark experience with mental illness, and that every day he still fights what inspired him to write this song. Until his early 20s, Chance had never really dealt with mental illness outside of “normal” depression and anxiety. He honestly thought he was immune to it. He was just busy being a teenager.
At 17 years old, Chance joined the Marines. Eventually, depression and anxiety would creep into his life as he got older. A severe form of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) became obvious after his time in the military. Chance does believe that being in the military could have been a factor in this core issue worsening. He admits that when he was a kid he would do “weird” things that could be related to OCD, but it had intensified.
Eventually, because of general anxiety and depression, some caused by the OCD and some caused by life itself, his therapist thought perhaps a low dose of anti-depression medication might help. Chance wasn’t really fond of the idea of medicating for that kind of stuff, so at first he fought it, but eventually he decided to try it. For about a week he experienced some weird side effects, but he honestly did feel better — until he absolutely DID NOT.
According to his psychiatrist, Chance had a pretty bad reaction in which his OCD got much worse than he had ever dealt with before, but instead of the weird and silly things and being annoyed all the time, he had terrible, intrusive thoughts he couldn’t handle. He didn’t even know this was a symptom of OCD until it happened to him. He couldn’t control the terrible things that kept popping into his head no matter what he tried. It literally felt like the Devil was in his head telling him things, making him think things, things he would never, ever do and things that could never represent who he was as a person.
Most people, in fact it has been proven that pretty much everyone, has intrusive thoughts, but some people can just throw them aside as fast as they have them. On this medication, however, Chance obsessed over them and worried that they may actually represent something real about him even thought they really didn’t at all. The more you stress and obsess over trying to understand the intrusive thoughts or try to prove to yourself that they aren’t real the more aggressive they get. It’s a vicious cycle.
This whole situation tore Chance down really badly. He didn’t want to go anywhere or do anything. He would have crying fits, anxiety attacks, and he just basically struggled to live for quite a long while. He admits he felt suicidal, but those thoughts were just a small part of the intrusive thoughts he was dealing with. He stopped the medication and was honest with his therapist and his wife, friends, and family about the thoughts he had been having and what he had been dealing with. Eventually, he got to the point that he could finally breathe and manage them. Through therapy he has realized how deeply rooted his OCD is and just how severe it is for him, and how it has affected every part of his life. Chance also admits that he is a hypochondriac. His whole family will tell anyone that, so he also stresses about this and general health pretty badly. But he now has the tools to fight it.
Before I continue, I need to include that Chance wanted to emphasize something very important – he does not knock medicating for depression or anxiety. He just truly feels that it’s not for everyone, and the road to finding the right medication can be very long and hard. He is aware that it has helped many people he knows personally, but it can also have negative effects. It’s really about the right path to the right medication for each person individually, and he encourages people to do research and get a better understanding of it. For him personally, he hated what it did to his head and he still deals with it, but he knows that doesn’t mean there isn’t something out there that might help his OCD in the future. At this current time, however, he’s going to stay off the medication until he feels it’s the right time to try it again – if he ever does.
So what did Chance do as one of the ways to cope with this dark situation? He wrote a song about it. “The Devil Came For Me” is truly about what it felt like during this whole experience. It felt like the Devil had come after him and was in his head, speaking the worst possible things to him. It made Chance feel evil. He didn’t know what was real and what wasn’t. His thoughts were not his own. The lyrics of “The Devil Came For Me” are pretty clear on just how bad it was for him at the time.
The chorus lyrics reflect the darkness:
“These thoughts are not my own
And these pains I can’t let grow
What’s in my head it can’t be known
I’m trapped from below
I met the Devil and he said
You’ll never know what’s real ‘til you’re dying
You’ll never know what’s real ‘til you’re dying”
There is also a point in the second verse when he talks about the effect of the medication:
“I look back at my life and before this
I had issues but never would I know that
I was better with the cards that I was dealt
Instead of trusting their artificial help
I asked for help through the medication
But opened doors to my own damnation”
Finally, at the end, is the declaration of determination that he’s going to overcome this and won’t let the Devil win, with Chance repeating the line “I won’t be taken”.
Along with the deep meaning behind “The Devil Came For Me”, it’s also a killer metalcore track! The music, especially the guitars and bass, are masterful. I must say, however, what really got me was Chance’s vocals. His screams are emphatic. Honestly, though, the thing that I’m most impressed with is his singing. I haven’t had the pleasure of hearing Chance sing much as a member of Etched In Embers, so I was actually shocked when I heard his voice on this song. I look forward to hearing more clean vocals from Chance on his future releases!
Since this is only the beginning for In Sight Of Mind, the future possibilities for this project are exciting. Chance says he has a lot of song ideas floating around in his head, in the notes on his phone, and on his computer. He says there is one he’s working on currently that is nearly finished, and, just like the first one, the writing of the song happened very fast. He truly believes that the songs that are easiest to write are usually some of the best. Chance says there may be a surprise guest vocalist on this next song.
Ultimately, Chance’s hope for In Sight Of Mind is growth. He wants to use this project to get a weight off his shoulders by telling his story, but also to grow as a musician, song writer, or even an audio engineer with each song he writes. Because of this, he is taking on writing most of the instrumentals for the next song because he knows he is capable of it and this will be another area for him to grow in. For Chance, this is a journey and he wants to learn as much as he can along the way. In a nutshell, In Sight Of Mind is about Chance sharing what’s in his head and growing as a musician. He promises we will be hearing more in the near future!
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